The Love, Character, and Faithfulness of a Grandfather

Today is a day of great significance for me, but not for the reasons you might expect. Yes, it marks a monumental Presidential election that will largely shape the foreseeable future of my beloved country. Sure, it’s an election that could dramatically change the cultural and economic landscapes for my children and grandchildren, but that isn’t what is on my heart this day. To be honest, despite the fact that my job is to protect the very freedoms we enjoy and cherish as Americans, I didn’t even vote this election. Am I apathetic? No, not really. Maybe it’s a combination of laziness coupled with the impossibility of submitting a ballot in time (after all, I do live in India!) to have my vote counted. Yeah, I may be a bit cynical, but in all honesty, my heart is elsewhere… Not just thousands of miles away from the political storm, but light years away, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. My heart is burdened.

The righteous who walks in his integrity--blessed are his children (and grandchildren!) after him! Prv. 20:7

Plus, the Bible gives the assurance that “there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God” (Romans 13:1) and that “kingship belongs to the Lord, and he rules over the nations.” (Psalm 22:28)  No, I’m not trying to justify not casting my vote, but instead affirming the fact that no ruler (president, prime minister, dictator, etc.) holds office apart from the will of God. So… why does this day hold such importance and why is my heart elsewhere?

Well, today marks the four-year anniversary of my dear Grandfather going home to be with the Lord. It’s hard to believe that it has been so long, as I can still fondly recall his voice, his laugh, his smile, his personality, his jokes, his stories, his golf swing, his humility, his love, his character, his relationship with my grandmother, his relationship with my Lord... as if I had seen him only yesterday. I have been blessed with many wonderful memories of the man we called “Grandad.” He truly was grand and every one of his grandchildren would attest to that fact. Grandad loved us with an unconditional and affirming love, but don’t think he didn’t discipline us. It’s true that the Lord disciplines those he loves (Proverbs 3:12 & Hebrews 12:6) and Grandad was not afraid to be an instrument of the Lord in that regard! Of course, his discipline was swift and fair, but most of the time his words were enough to motivate us to good behavior--the pain of disappointing Grandad was usually enough to steer us in the right direction.

The purpose in a man's heart is like deep water,
but a man of understanding will draw it out. Prv. 20:5

Some of my fondest memories of him were the hours we spent playing golf together during the summer in Colorado. Most of the time it was just Grandad, me, and some of his old buddies. Wow, what a pleasure for a young, adolescent boy to get to rub shoulders with a unique group of old guys who told the best stories and jokes you ever heard (I still wonder how they can remember them because I never could!). Usually, I was the only “kid” who played with them, though occasionally my sister or a cousin would join us. It truly was a privilege to walk down (or ride as was more often the case in the later years) the fairways with that group of men--Moe, Curly, Bill, Bob, and many others who were from all walks of life (spiritually, financially, and otherwise). More than anything, I was grateful to my Grandad for allowing me to be a part of that special group, even though on occasion, my errant shots prevented me from fully enjoying/embracing the experience! (NOTE: For those who haven’t played golf or don’t love the game, you need to understand that it is a microcosm of life--golf can bring out both the best and the worst in a person!)

An excellent wife who can find? (ANSWER: Grandad!) Prv. 31:10

Above and beyond all the special times we shared together on the golf course and our discourses on a variety of subjects--God, faith, love, women, politics, sports, and many other things--one of the things I most admired about my Grandad was his rich love for my grandma (Nonny). They were married for over 65 years and anyone who spent even a moment with them saw the great depth of their love for God, one another, their family, friends, and even strangers. It was a real blessing for me to get to see their relationship up close. I was able to observe how their love for each other grew deeper and deeper over the years despite many physical limitations. Near the end of his life, my Grandad had to live with Parkinson’s for quite a number of years. Apart from the grace of God and Nonny’s love, devotion, and care (as well as my Aunt Susan's), Grandad would not have lived such a full, rich, and long life. Even after sharing over 30 years with Grandad and Nonny, I couldn’t even begin to scratch the surface of their love for one another. When I read about love in the Bible and learn about how couples are to show it to one another, I know that Grandad and Nonny exemplify that incarnational (Christlike) love. They have set the expectation bar awfully high for this guy!

No couple in the world could be more lovable!

One thing about Grandad and Nonny is that they really knew the sacrifices and commitment that love required, even though they were married at 19!! As a teenager, could you imagine making a vow to spend the rest of your life with someone?! Then a few short years later, being separated because of WWII?! That is the story of my dear grandparents whose promises to each other were backed up by their will and actions. You see, Grandad was stationed in India for over a year and my mom was born during that difficult period of separation. They survived that tremendous obstacle and many others over the many years, but continued to grow in their love for the Lord and for each other. Grandad and Nonny made many costly sacrifices for their children and grandchildren to enjoy a better tomorrow. (Hmm... I wonder if our generation and maybe even the current leaders of our country could learn something from them?)

Oh, the memories of Grandad and that golf cart

Over the decades and generations (kids, grandkids, and great-grandkids), God blessed my grandparents so very richly and through them blessed our family. They stayed faithful to their wedding vows, through sickness and health, richer and poorer, and didn't waver through any of the storms of life. I really envy them and what they shared as a couple. Few couples today could even hold a candle to the richness of their relationship with God and with each other. What an incredible legacy they have left for their children, grandchildren (ME!) and great-grandchildren. I’m so thankful that Nonny continues to be such a huge encouragement to me in the midst of difficult and trying circumstances, even though I know she misses Grandad even more than I do.

Grandad and his brothers; an adoring Nonny looks on...

On this day of thanksgiving, reflection, and remembrance, I thank God for His faithful promises that are as real now, as they were when Abraham, Noah, Moses, David, and Christ walked this earth. I can therefore look forward to being reunited with Grandad one day in glory when God will make all things new again. “He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore…” (Revelation 21:4) It will be wonderful to see my grandfather again with a perfect body. Then we can rejoice at being able to fully taste and see that the Lord is good.

I thank God for the wonderful gift of Junius Myrl Penny, one of the godliest men I will ever known. He has shown me by his faithful life, that “to live is Christ and to die is gain.” (Philippians 1:21) I will never forget my last moments with Grandad and how he held my hand so very, very tightly and would not let go… it reminds me of how God holds us in the palm of His hand--so tightly that not even death can separate us from His love.

Praise God from whom all blessings flow!

Wearing bowties in Grandad's honor

God is faithful to all generations (Ps. 100:5)